Episode 6: Ashlan
“LOVE KNOWS NO BOUNDS.”
- Ashlan Carnel Zurbriggen
Released May/8/2020“I think what I was trying to get at was, I have forgiven my dad for all we went through. I’m grateful we had those 10 months together to begin the healing process. Motherhood has also taught me that my dad did the very best he could with the experiences he endured as a kid himself. It’s hard to change especially if we grow up in a toxic environment. Basically, grace wins in the end. I can now look forward to a healthy environment with my own family.” - Ashlan
Ashlan and her dad Tom only 1 month after his diagnosis.
Ashlan and Autumn
Ashlan states she was in thick postpartum depression here. She said for 5-7 months she secluded herself before getting help. Counseling was not something she had initially thought she needed.
Ashlan, Autumn, and Sienna
Welcome, sweet Isaiah!
Falling in love all over again…
Ashlan with the girls
“Fear can take such a strong hold in our life. In our darkest valley there were months where I didn’t even feel God. I would beg Him to show me He was near. I was so deep in prayer but his silence was deafening. The book of Isaiah is all about our deep dark valleys.”
- Ashlan
Matt with all his VERY happy kids.
Sienna and Autumn with their new brother Isaiah
“I can’t believe he is ours.” - Autumn
Isaiah 40:31
Isaiah 41:10
Isaiah 43:19
Contact Ashlan at ashlan.carnel@gmail.com
Check out Mix and Match Mama on Instagram
to learn more about Shay!
If you or someone you love needs help, please visit Postpartum Depression .org for information, resources, statistics, reports, treatment options, helpline, and more.
INTERESTING STATISTICS FROM THE INITIATIVE FOR FAMILY STUDIES...The Changing Face of Adoption in the United States
((The racial and ethnic composition of the adopted child population in the U.S. has changed dramatically in less than a generation. This IFS research brief compares adopted children in two large national studies of kindergarten students conducted a decade apart by the federal Department of Education1. The proportion of adopted kindergartners being raised by a mother of a different race or ethnic group rose by 50% between 1999 and 2011. The proportion of adoptees with Asian backgrounds nearly tripled over the same time period. Paradoxically, the fraction of adopted students who are African-American seems to have fallen. What has not changed is that a large majority of adoptive parents are white, older, well-educated, and relatively affluent.
Underlying these demographic shifts are a number of other trends affecting the supply of adoptable infants and the demand for those babies by childless couples in this country. Due primarily to dramatic reductions in pregnancy and birth rates among teenagers, the domestic supply of adoptable infants has declined.2 When unmarried young women do give birth, more of them are attempting to raise their offspring on their own, or with assistance from grandparents or other relatives, rather than putting the child up for adoption.3 Child welfare agencies often favor the placement of foster children with relatives, rather than with unrelated adoptive parents.4 In addition, activist pushback against upper middle-class whites adopting black or American Indian babies from poor families may be influencing couples toward adoption choices that are less controversial.
However, the demand for adoptable infants remains robust5 as many mature couples experience impaired fertility,6 having put off trying to have children until their late 30s or early 40s. Faced with a shortage of domestic candidates and barriers to taking in some neglected or abused children, potential adopters often look abroad for infants or toddlers in need of permanent homes.7 While international adoptions are not necessarily or intentionally interracial, they often turn out that way, as when white American couples adopt children from China, Guatemala, or Ethiopia.8 Click here for more statistics and information from the Institute of Family Studies.))
Source: Zill, N. (2017). Analysis of data from the Early Childhood Longitudinal Study of the Kindergarten Class of 2010-2011. National Center for Education Statistics, U.S. Department of Education.
Source: Zill, N. (2017). Analysis of data from the Early Childhood Longitudinal Study of the Kindergarten Class of 2010-2011. National Center for Education Statistics, U.S. Department of Education.
Paul David Tripp’s Testimony
“Weakness is my lot. Suffering is my prison. You have chained me to frailty. I cannot break free. There's the weakness of suffering. There's the loss of control. There is the pain of wondering what God is doing. There is this irrationality that - how can it be that God would render me the weakest in my life at the point of my greatest influence? God was doing things in the heart of Paul Tripp that had long needed to be done. That what I would have named as faith in Christ was actually pride in my strength, pride in my ability to produce, pride in my physical health. That is not real faith. And God put me in a place where I began to believe that His grace is sufficient. It is made perfect in my weakness. Those hammers on me were hammers of an artist changing the shape of my heart so that I would believe in a more deeper fuller way what I had preached to others for years. If this is what it takes for God to produce that in me, this has been worth it. This prison is your workroom and I am your clay. You are not a jailer, you are a potter. I have not been condemned. I am being molded. My weakness is not about what I am enduring, my weakness is about what I am becoming. My strength is and has always been You.” - Paul David Tripp
How to Cultivate Communal Comfort in Your Suffering
“Suffering powerfully highlights what has always been true—we were not created for independent living. Suffering reminds us that God’s grace doesn’t work to propel our independence but to deepen our vertical and horizontal dependence. The strong, independent, self-made person is a delusion. Everyone needs help and assistance. To fight community, to quest for self-sufficiency, is not only a denial of your spiritual need; it’s a denial of your humanity. Suffering is a messenger telling us that to be human is to be dependent.” -Paul David TrippWho Are You? Identity Amnesia | Grace Liberates Your Identity | Paul Tripp
If you or someone you love needs help, please visit Postpartum Depression .org for information, resources, statistics, reports, treatment options, helpline, and more.
NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental Illness, is the nation's largest grassroots mental health organization dedicated to building better lives for the millions of Americans affected by mental illness.Find a local support group near you for substance abuse at Alcoholics Anonymous. We can all help prevent suicide. The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals. Call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.
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